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Poem was rejected....

Sepulchritude Forum » The Absinthe Forum Archive thru June 2002 » Archive Thru April 2002 » Poem was rejected.... « Previous Next »

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Larsbogart
Posted on Wednesday, May 1, 2002 - 6:29 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

LOSING HER HAIR
Gettingsane
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 11:51 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

SHES OUT THERE
Larsbogart
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 11:18 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Poetry a careful thing?
think not
think no more lines
Larsbogart
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 10:53 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Careful line

"had the moth more care than a craftmans hair?
who takes so long to butterfly its song?
if the moth revised
whoever heard of moth buttering its cloth?
with chancreous changes
and cat fur manges
whoever thought
a moth
would sit and reconsider
the better way to troth
than one so bitter
his furlong gaze
upon his capillary haze
sit and pester readers
with magic pleaters
so
doth
the moth
revise?"
Larsbogart
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 9:51 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

"Think you the virgin queen needs the bomb?
Think you the pope sore because of baby doll?
Think you my cursed leg is near to bethlehem?
Think you I was a thief in London?
Think you shelter is no better than a misty tree?
Think you a christmas tree is worth 10 bucks?
Think you an answer ever answers those who live to see?"
I think its all a crock of shit.
Mr_Rabid
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 7:17 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Yours was better anyway :-)
Verawench
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 7:04 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Your poem is rejected.
- Lest you carve away
our cataracts
of milky moron meat.

But who, pray tell, has sent
to our Marbled offices
This jar of piss and pecker snot
in a bottle labeled "Hill's"?

It was signed...
"The Forum"

Hahahaha, I love you Rabbit.

Wench
Mr_Rabid
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 6:53 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Waltzing with the corpse
of Jimmi Hendrix
broken line prose
complains
endlessly
around the issue
of wishing we were poets
as we dance to the beat
as Jimmi's rotting meat
leaves trails of putrecsence
'pon the floor

we will reject your poem
the words we just don't knowem
we produce a college publication
for the future of the nation

and as such we avoid
asking the students
to think
better they should read

poems

bout boats and lonley deserts
and roses weeping blood
and stuff
better
they should
fuck pigs and learn to drink
Chevalier
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 4:05 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

I think that literature review is from Canada. It focuses on queer (as in gay and lesbian, but I believe mostly lesbian) fiction.
Kite
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 2:23 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

--I can only imagine what it will be, meaningless prose complaining about something with irregular cuts in the sentences.--

Good thing you're far more visionary than the rest of the literary world... Anyway, shop your poem around. There are lots of other venues where your poem would be better appreciated than in a college lit. magazine. I haven't looked much into it, but there's actually an online lit. publication called the Absinthe Literature Review.
-Kite
Head_Prosthesis
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 2:09 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

About 10 years ago, James Douglas Ward called Lawrence Ferlinghetti.

Lawrence Ferlinghetti: Hello?

Jimmy: Hi. Lawrence?

LF: Yes?

Jimmy: I'm James Douglas Ward. I submitted some poems for you to look at for publication.

LF: Who are you?

Jimmy: James Douglas Ward!

LF: You're the Lord?

Jimmy: That's right I'M JESUS CHRIST THE LORD!!! YOU GONNNA PUBLISH MY SHIT OR WHAT???

LF: click...
Chevalier
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 10:38 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Ending the piece with the word "void" -- the breathtaking nihilism it conjures! This poem should be entitled ... eBay of Pigs
Chrysippvs
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 10:30 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

lol Chev..


I am going to get a copy of the journal tomorrow to see what beat me out...

I can only imagine what it will be, meaningless prose complaining about something with irregular cuts in the sentences.

For instance:

"Payment is by any major credit card through PayPal or E-Bay Payments, Money Order, International Money Order, or Personal Check. Item ships when payment is verified. Payment must be received within 10 days of close of auction or sale is void."

is not poetry

although

Payment is by
any major credit card through
PayPal
or E-Bay Payments, Money Order,
International Money Order, or
Personal Check.

Item ships
when payment is
verified.
Payment must be received
within 10 days of close of auction
or sale is

void."

This on the other hand is considered poetry to some...

- J
Chevalier
Posted on Tuesday, April 30, 2002 - 9:29 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

About 190 years ago, Francis Scott Key received a letter from the editors of Millsaps College Literary Journal.

"Dear Mr. Key:

We find the first stanza of your poem, 'The Star-Spangled Banner', seems to use words and phrases unknown, and untranslatable, for the people that would be reading this journal. Below is the stanza as you have submitted it to us:


Oh, say, can you see, by the dawn's early light,
What so proudly we hail'd at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars, thro' the perilous fight,
O'er the ramparts we watch'd, were so gallantly streaming?
And the rocket's red glare, the bombs bursting in air
Gave proof thro' the night that our flag was still there.
Oh, say, does that Star-Spangled Banner yet wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?


May we suggest that you replace it with the following adaptation?:


You see this morning what we saw last night?
That thing we watched throughout the fight?
The flashing blasts kept the flag all night in sight,
Yo, that flag still fly on our kick-ass nationís might?


Sincerely Yours,
The editors of Millsaps College Literary Journal"
Larsbogart
Posted on Monday, April 29, 2002 - 10:42 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

SKIN
Do I notice the difference?
Yes every day
Yes in every possible way
Am I prejudice
Do stereotypes
In my thoughts
Invade
Yes
Are you trying to tell me?
That for you
It is not that way?
But do I hate you
Look down on you
In anyway
From characteristics that birth gave
No
Only
By your actions
As an individual
To me and others
Do such emotions rage.

CW
Chrysippvs
Posted on Monday, April 29, 2002 - 9:05 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Well, the poem (the alchemy one) was rejected for the college literary journal on the grounds that it was "too esoteric" and that "the subject matter seems to use a set of symbols unknown, and untranslatable, for the people that would be reading this journal." They concluded with "due to the length we felt that other poems should be included that would be more intelligible to the Millsaps reader."

Is it surprising? Nope. I couldn't honestly expect them to print nearly 100 lines of this...or should I?


- J

PS. I want the opinion of anatomist concerning the poem...I know he will be good and vicious...

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