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Archive through August 07, 2002

Sepulchritude Forum » The Absinthe Forum Archive thru January 2003 » The Monkey Hole » Terrible News! » Archive through August 07, 2002 « Previous Next »

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Nolamour
Posted on Wednesday, August 7, 2002 - 9:00 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

weak...

(scans the room for onlookers, begins to adjust his bra.)
Bob_Chong
Posted on Wednesday, August 7, 2002 - 1:11 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Not that it matters, but it wasn't until I saw your profile that I realized you weren't a woman. I'm serious (and I'm *not* insulting you nor women...just mentioning an observation). BTW--my barriers bit was legit critique.
Nolamour
Posted on Wednesday, August 7, 2002 - 12:58 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Listen Chong,

To begin, I didn't prompt your opinion on my personal site created for friends and family...You know nothing of my depth.

NOR, did I come out and insult you without purpose and I shall not begin now.

As a traditional artist and contemporary designer I have learned the value of actual critique and I take all. You catch more flies with honey and for this reason, among others, I have a 100% approval rating among my clients.

I could care less about what you could shit on. Next time you have a problem, you could simply inform me like an adult and I would gladly take your comments. Otherwise, I really don't give a damn and I will not berate the subject further.
Bob_Chong
Posted on Tuesday, August 6, 2002 - 11:36 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

OK, less hyperbole on my part. If you even care, what I see is barriers. I go to your site and think, "Interesting, a site about N.O." And then I run into barriers. The idea is to design for maximum accessibility. Think of the audience, not yourself. It seems like a selfish design, that's all. To put it in terms of the physical, you've built a house for midgets with a moat and landmines around it...and just for kicks, you put shards of broken glass on the wheelchair ramp.
Bob_Chong
Posted on Tuesday, August 6, 2002 - 11:31 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Nola:

You are out of your depth. I have forgotten more about design than you will ever know. I shit on your work. This is not anger, just the cold, hard facts.

BC
Nolamour
Posted on Tuesday, August 6, 2002 - 8:37 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

So, why does this make you so angry? Sit back and have a tea bag. Your lack of knowledge of the truth doesn't even faze me.
Bob_Chong
Posted on Tuesday, August 6, 2002 - 12:26 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

And the fact that you apparently do this sort of thing for a living makes me chuckle. PT Barnum was right.
Bob_Chong
Posted on Tuesday, August 6, 2002 - 12:20 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Nolamor:

Perhaps the stolen bottle was payment of the karmic debt your owed for your anal use of javascript on your homepage (e.g., disabling right click in order to advertise for yourself...). In fact, none of the links on your homepage works on my machine, which is the fault of the designer (you), not the user (me). I was able to peek around some of the subordinate pages by viewing the source code and manually pasting URLs into my browser...cool content!...anyway, long story short: READ SOME FUCKING JACOB NIELSEN. And have your ever heard of a usability test? Otherwise, why even bother--it's masturbatory.
Admin
Posted on Monday, August 5, 2002 - 12:41 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

indeed. eeep.
Wolfgang
Posted on Monday, August 5, 2002 - 12:32 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

I thought it was prohibited to talk about **OOPS** around here...?
Nolamour
Posted on Saturday, August 3, 2002 - 12:04 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Monsieur Chevalier,

If you were the one to procure my stolen bottle, I hope you'd know the familiar procedure of consumption.

The best part is trying to explain to the USPS what exactly was in the package.
Pikkle
Posted on Friday, August 2, 2002 - 11:43 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

hmm... I'd drink to that.
Tortainglese
Posted on Friday, August 2, 2002 - 11:39 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

unless your neighbors believed the customs lable that said **OOPS** and made some really weird high octane pesto with it.
Chevalier
Posted on Friday, August 2, 2002 - 5:19 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Don't call me an ignorant bastard!
Nolamour
Posted on Friday, August 2, 2002 - 4:21 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

More terrible news...

I found out this week that a long awaited package was carelessly left on my porch by an idiot postal worker and was STOLEN! I feel violated. The only retribution is the thought of the ignorant bastard opening the bottle to throw back a swig and yacking down his shirt.

Hmmm...the Gravy Tailed Fem Feline????
Head_Prosthesis
Posted on Friday, August 2, 2002 - 10:40 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Horny Cats and fishy smells.

I'm all frisk and purrs...

MEOWW! BABY!!!
Admin
Posted on Friday, August 2, 2002 - 6:46 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

cat gravy!
Head_Prosthesis
Posted on Friday, August 2, 2002 - 3:27 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

So there's still jelly involved.
It just ain't on the toes.
Tortainglese
Posted on Friday, August 2, 2002 - 1:21 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Here is the bad news from NYC: We discovered that Rudi the Jelly Toe Cat is a GIRL! She is in heat and my other cat Max, a fixed male, is trying his best to get his parts working.
When we adopted Rudi, we were told HE was a Fixed MALE. OOPS! I guess Max knew the real score all along. Unless maybe Max is gay.....
Pikkle
Posted on Thursday, August 1, 2002 - 8:00 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Sailor?
Head_Prosthesis
Posted on Thursday, August 1, 2002 - 7:37 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Oh you've got the DSL's, Honey.
I've seen your picture.
Traineraz
Posted on Thursday, August 1, 2002 - 5:56 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

EVEN WORSE NEWS!!

(Well, for you people, anyway.)

The house won't be ready this weekend, so I had to reschedule movers for Wednesday. That means no phone from Wednesday morning til Thursday afternoon. Why, you won't hardly miss me at all, unless you can't handle a rifle.

There still won't be MUCH of me til I have DSL, of course.
Pikkle
Posted on Thursday, August 1, 2002 - 2:29 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

You said "breath."
Head_Prosthesis
Posted on Thursday, August 1, 2002 - 12:17 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Yay!


I mean

eh hem...


We'll be waiting with masturbated breath.
Traineraz
Posted on Thursday, August 1, 2002 - 12:00 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

I wanted to give everyone fair warning . . .

I'm moving on Saturday, and won't have phone service until Thursday; probably won't have DSL back up for a couple of weeks after that . . .
So [sniff] you may not see my insightful and delightfully humorous postings [weep] after tomorrow for [cry] at least most of a week, probably more like three.

I'm sure you'll all miss me somethin' fierce. I'll try to pull through somehow, and have faith that all of you will survive the trauma.

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