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Archive through May 6, 2003

Sepulchritude Forum » The Absinthe Forum » The Monkey Hole » Ultimate driving morons » Archive through May 6, 2003 « Previous Next »

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Karl (Raschied)
le Duc
Username: Raschied

Post Number: 305
Registered: 3-2002


Posted on Tuesday, May 6, 2003 - 10:33 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Heh, insurance paper was lost when I wrecked. Thanks to paying online, I had inadvertently memorized my policy number. I wrote it down on the back of my registration (they provide a space for it now) and called information for my insurance's phone number. I already had a claim number when the CHP appeared on the scene. They accepted the handwritten policy number as proof.

Back went out today. Bad.

Also, car is permanently parked in the driveway. Exhaust is leaking onto the passenger compartment. Stuck in a rental until I get word how much my car is worth. C-pillars are bent. Total loss.
Rock over London, Rock on Chicago.
Pontiac - We build Excitement.
ENORMUS DICK (Louched_liver)
Absinthe Mafia
Username: Louched_liver

Post Number: 1637
Registered: 12-2001


Posted on Tuesday, May 6, 2003 - 9:38 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

And I'm uninsured.
Will work for absinthe.
ENORMUS DICK (Louched_liver)
Absinthe Mafia
Username: Louched_liver

Post Number: 1636
Registered: 12-2001


Posted on Tuesday, May 6, 2003 - 9:37 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

I try to walk as much as possible.
Will work for absinthe.
Spoon Boy (Absinthespoon)
le Duc
Username: Absinthespoon

Post Number: 277
Registered: 7-2001


Posted on Tuesday, May 6, 2003 - 9:20 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

ALWAYS keep your proof of insurance in your car. The bail is almost $800 if you get cited for not having this piece of paper with you. And you have to go to traffic court to get it reduced, because the clerks at the window can't do it. And you are ineligible for traffic school (unless corrected).

Traffic court moves fast! Even though there were about 100 people in court, and I was about 85 on the list, it was over in 2 hours. About 80 of the people in front of me spoke only Spanish and were there for driving without a license and insurance (okay, it was Redwood City). Showed my insurance papers to the judge, bail reduced to $78 plus $32 for traffic school, which I am now eligible for. Yes!

Internet traffic school! This is so much better than sitting in the church basement at night for tedious hours with a bunch of other losers. I can sit at home, surf the net and drink booze!
www.TooLazyForTrafficSchool.com (I liked this one best.)
Only two more modules to go! Wish me luck.
Masqued Reveler (Nolamour)
Elitist Bastard
Username: Nolamour

Post Number: 653
Registered: 5-2002


Posted on Sunday, April 27, 2003 - 4:24 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Go to Sun City Arizona - A full city of retired people. All transportation is modified golf carts.
Kind of looking like the blue and white one Karl posted below.

My Camry was like the Sproose Goose driving around town.
Laissez le Bon Temps Rouler!
Pervert Euchre (Perruche_verte)
Elitist Bastard
Username: Perruche_verte

Post Number: 457
Registered: 12-2000


Posted on Sunday, April 27, 2003 - 2:25 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

That is so cool. To the extent I can be said to love cars, I love smart, round, podlike little cars that look like they ought to be powered by rocket engines and used to escape from Imperial Tie Fighters.

Here, we don't think it's a car unless it's large enough to fuck on the back seat, store a couple of weeks' laundry, and if need be, serve as a place of residence "down by the river".
"Drink accomplished what God did not." --Marguerite Duras
Karl (Raschied)
le Duc
Username: Raschied

Post Number: 297
Registered: 3-2002


Posted on Sunday, April 27, 2003 - 11:43 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Yep, you'd fit right in, with the Smart Cars:

smartcar

and owing a Mercedes in Europe doesn't quite have the same meaning as it does over here:

mercedes


But try to find parking!

parking
Rock over London, Rock on Chicago.
Pontiac - We build Excitement.
Lordhobgoblin (Lordhobgoblin)
Absinthe Mafia
Username: Lordhobgoblin

Post Number: 755
Registered: 10-2000


Posted on Sunday, April 27, 2003 - 10:45 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Kallisti,

With a car like that you're in the wrong continent. Come to Europe, you'd never have to worry about not being seen, half the population drive cars that size, the Ford Fiesta is the best selling car in the UK.
mattm3 (Mattm3)
le Duc
Username: Mattm3

Post Number: 169
Registered: 4-2003


Posted on Sunday, April 27, 2003 - 8:06 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Twin Peaks! One of the greatest casts of hotties of all time! And a damn fine cuppa joe.
Goth Girls Rule!!!
ENORMUS DICK (Louched_liver)
Absinthe Mafia
Username: Louched_liver

Post Number: 1501
Registered: 12-2001


Posted on Saturday, April 26, 2003 - 8:15 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Great tales!

I love the macrame shawl and the light changing, Kalladmin. No wonder you loved Twin Peaks.
Where once I was lost, I now come back to pee.
Brett Tyre (Brett)
le Duc
Username: Brett

Post Number: 137
Registered: 4-2002


Posted on Friday, April 25, 2003 - 10:26 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

I almost got sued by a vindictive lady without even being in an accident.

I didn't see her coming becase a big, parked truck had blocked my view. I proceed to make my right turn and all of a sudden I hear a car slamming on the brakes. Looking back,I see a car's headlights shining in my rear window.

I drive, and to make a long story short, I was threatened by a nasty police officer and told to call this lady. I was told by this lady that I never should leave the scene of an accident, and how her car had spun (funny, it must have done a 360 because she ended up facing in the direction she was heading) and she hurt herself and so on. I wasn't aware I had been in an accident to leave.

To make a long story short, the insurance company concluded that while I could have been more cautious (how cautious could I get? I stopped at the corner and there wasn't even a stop sign there!) but the lady was likely driving too fast for the conditions and not paying attention. (She had her twin 4 year olds in the back -they distracted her maybe?) Had she been paying attention, she would have seen me in time to slow down and not slam on the brakes.

So now that the insurance company has sided with me, I get a phone call from this lady's husband threatening me with legal action if I don't pay them! Ha! When my father (I was 18 at the time) referred her to his lawyer, that shut her up pretty quick.
Kallisti (Admin)
Madame Guillotine
Username: Admin

Post Number: 1009
Registered: 1-1998


Posted on Friday, April 25, 2003 - 9:27 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

the only trouble I have these days is getting smooshed by semis. I have a tiny red festiva, it's about half the size of a regular small car, and they just can't see me.

I've had it just over a year and I've been almost forced into the rail or actually into another lane four times.

FESTIVA PRIDE!!!!

wooo!

“A lady who has a secure seat is never prettier than when in the saddle, and she who cannot make her conquest there, may despair of the power of her charms elsewhere.” - THE MANNERS THAT WIN, 1880

http://www.feeverte.net
Kallisti (Admin)
Madame Guillotine
Username: Admin

Post Number: 1008
Registered: 1-1998


Posted on Friday, April 25, 2003 - 9:20 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

When I was two my mother and I were leaving the Toot Sweets toy store on College Ave in Berkeley, and I was so excited to get back to the car to play with my barbie that I let go her hand and dashed out into traffic. I was smacked by a car, flew fifteen feet into the air (my poor mother!) and landed on my back.

That sensation of having the wind knocked out of you is cruel when you're too young to understand the universe. I rememeber staring up, not being able to breathe, and seeing the red light turn to green. People were crowding around and a lady put her white macrame shawl over me.

And then the ambulance came. Weeeee!

I was fine, they just had to pick gravel out of my back and bandage a few cuts.

Mom said I never cried.


“A lady who has a secure seat is never prettier than when in the saddle, and she who cannot make her conquest there, may despair of the power of her charms elsewhere.” - THE MANNERS THAT WIN, 1880

http://www.feeverte.net
Masqued Reveler (Nolamour)
Elitist Bastard
Username: Nolamour

Post Number: 648
Registered: 5-2002


Posted on Friday, April 25, 2003 - 8:47 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

OK...Here's my fav.

I'm driving normally in the left lane. A car about 10 feet in front of me in the RIGHT lane decides to take a LEFT U-TURN...crossing the left lane. Whaaaaammmooo! I plow into her.

I get out and ask (first thing)...are you OK? She says YES...Then, Do you know you are at fault here? She says YES. So, I call the cops, she calls her boyfriend. The boyfriend shows up first.
Suddenly, the whole story changes. The boyfriend comes up to me and asks: Have you been drinking? Uh, No...(not yet).
The cop shows up, hands out no tickets and we are going to let insurance take care of it.

11 months later...I get served papers - WHAT??????? I go to my lawyer with pictures of my car - The right side smashed. We go to court...right at 12 months. She is there in a neck brace all dressed up. You gotta be kidding me...
My lawyer shows her lawyer the pictures of the car - They ask to settle. Case closed. She gets nothing...DAMN IT!

MORONS!
Laissez le Bon Temps Rouler!
Karl (Raschied)
le Duc
Username: Raschied

Post Number: 296
Registered: 3-2002


Posted on Friday, April 25, 2003 - 7:41 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

The neck is a little stiff this morning, but I've already got the drugs lined up. I stopped in the evening care clinic last night, and the doc hooked me up with muscle relaxers and heavy-duty Naproxen for the pain. That, coupled with the codeine-based cough syrup I'm taking, and I slept like a baby.
Rock over London, Rock on Chicago.
Pontiac - We build Excitement.
The Red Pigeon (Icarus)
le Duc
Username: Icarus

Post Number: 135
Registered: 4-2003


Posted on Friday, April 25, 2003 - 6:37 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

... and crosby had to walk to work, barefoot, through the snow, uphill... both ways.

This was back when candy bars were only a nickel.
Crosby (Crosby)
Absinthe Mafia
Username: Crosby

Post Number: 483
Registered: 12-2001


Posted on Friday, April 25, 2003 - 5:05 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

You wimp! My buddy rolled the car with me in it. Like you, it rolled three times. I had to go to work the next day, cracked ribs and all. 23 years ago, it's amazing any of us lived to be adults.
C'est ma santé
Althea (Rosietwobears)
le Vicomte
Username: Rosietwobears

Post Number: 52
Registered: 10-2002


Posted on Friday, April 25, 2003 - 3:42 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

i totaled my car when i was 17 (78 buick)
i rolled it 3 times and flew out of the window in the process (what seatbelts?) i was in a ditch when the car rolled over me so that saved my sorry ass. i landed myself in the hospital for almost 2 weeks with a broken collarbone on the right, compression fracture in my spine and every rib on my left was cracked.

the wreck was my own fault. i was doing 90 mph on a blind curve on a country road in spotsylvania county virginia.
not too smart.
i was fined as a juvenile for reckless driving and i had to serve 40 hours of community service in the ER getting all the nifty jobs like babysitting corpses while waiting for the morgue staff to show up and mopping up blood from betwixt the feet of Drs. and nurses when the man with the hemmoraging lung filled the suction container to overflowing. i also had to take a course on driver safety. weeeeee!
my only wreck to date, and it was about 13 years ago.
Absinthe maketh the heart grow fonder
MC Pee Pants (Fluffy_g)
Mousquetaire
Username: Fluffy_g

Post Number: 20
Registered: 3-2003


Posted on Friday, April 25, 2003 - 12:56 am:   Edit PostPrint Post

Here's one for ya. I'm slowly backing out of a parking stall in a crowded lot(I can't see shit cause an urban battle ship is parked next to me)Then BAM! A honda bairly clips the edge of my bumper. An inch deep gash was left in the other persons car running from the front Q.panel all the way to the back one.
The Honda squeels to a stop and the driver gets out.
The driver... a 16yr old asian chick bairly tall enough to see over the steering wheel. She had a nice lipstick smear running from her lips down the side of her face.
She even sayed that she was doing 30+ in front of witnesses!

End result... she had the right of way. My worthless lazy ass insurance company said they couldn't prove that she was speeding (probably didn't bother to call the witnesses. Im sure the gash in her car wasn't a tell tale sign of speeding either.) So it was legally all my fault, and now I'm getting f*<ked with insurance costs. YAY!
Citizen Dildo
Masqued Reveler (Nolamour)
Elitist Bastard
Username: Nolamour

Post Number: 646
Registered: 5-2002


Posted on Thursday, April 24, 2003 - 11:48 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

You want drivin Morons? Even a bad lawyer is a rich man here in N'Awlins.
Laissez le Bon Temps Rouler!
Masqued Reveler (Nolamour)
Elitist Bastard
Username: Nolamour

Post Number: 645
Registered: 5-2002


Posted on Thursday, April 24, 2003 - 11:46 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

I guess drunk minds think alike. eh Mr. Pigeon?
Laissez le Bon Temps Rouler!
The Red Pigeon (Icarus)
le Duc
Username: Icarus

Post Number: 134
Registered: 4-2003


Posted on Thursday, April 24, 2003 - 11:45 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

Damn, your lawyer is quicker than mine!
The Red Pigeon (Icarus)
le Duc
Username: Icarus

Post Number: 133
Registered: 4-2003


Posted on Thursday, April 24, 2003 - 11:45 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

How's your neck? Any problem sleeping or paranoia about driving... or cars (hint hint).
Masqued Reveler (Nolamour)
Elitist Bastard
Username: Nolamour

Post Number: 644
Registered: 5-2002


Posted on Thursday, April 24, 2003 - 11:44 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

How's the neck feeling about now Karl?
Laissez le Bon Temps Rouler!
Karl (Raschied)
le Duc
Username: Raschied

Post Number: 295
Registered: 3-2002


Posted on Thursday, April 24, 2003 - 11:42 pm:   Edit PostPrint Post

This thread is about bitching and whining about your latest ticket/accident.

Mine was today.

I got rear-ended by a 17-year old princess driving either (take your pick) her new graduation gift, or Daddy's new car, a 2003 bright red Mustang.

Traffic suddenly slowed, and she didn't react quick enough, and plowed into my little Civic wagon. I gotta say - I drove away from the scene (after CHP took my statement) while her front end was peeled back to the wheel wells. She needed a flatbed tow truck to get the thing out of the road. All hail Hondas!

Now, if my passenger doors only opened....

Don't worry about the princess - she was shaken up by the airbag deploying, but one quick call to her parents, and they were there in the Lexus in 10 minutes.

I go to the insurance appraiser tomorrow. My first accident EVER. Pissmeoff.....
Rock over London, Rock on Chicago.
Pontiac - We build Excitement.

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