Your Favorite Wrestlers

Sepulchritude Forum: The Absinthe Forum Archives Thru July 2001: Your Favorite Wrestlers
By Head_Prosthesis on Friday, May 25, 2001 - 08:59 am: Edit

A little song me and JohnJohn wrote one night...


Thujone turns his smile into a frown upside
He calls his child Momo `cause he's bad at spelling names
And he sends him to the swimming pool in town.

Thujone, Thujone loves his mommy
He mates with her all day
Mother's day humping
In a hotel by the Super K.

He was born a shopper
For some porn on a Christmas day
When the Detroit News
Said Chong is Head and the Tiger's won.
Alice Topless got big'uns today.

And he shall be Thujone
And he shall be a good man.
And he shall be Thujone.
In addition to
The master plan
And he shall be Thujone.
And he shall be a good man.
He shall be Thujone.

Thujone sells cocaine balloons in town.
His Mother's vulva thrives.
Momo blows up bridges all day,
Sitting on the dock barrels watching them fly.
And Momo , he wants to grow a penis.
To stick in Thujone's behind.
Take an erection
And go nailing,
While Thujone,
Thujone bakes his pies.

And he shall be Thujone.
And he shall be a good man.
He shall be Thujone

By Head_Prosthesis on Sunday, May 20, 2001 - 10:25 am: Edit

Be a Bubble Head

By Head_Prosthesis on Sunday, May 20, 2001 - 01:36 am: Edit

One more green pepper and I'm going to bed

By Head_Prosthesis on Sunday, May 20, 2001 - 01:02 am: Edit

Abba...

By Head_Prosthesis on Saturday, May 19, 2001 - 01:58 pm: Edit

I wonder when the Supreme Court is going to bust up the Wrestling monopoly that the McMahon family has. Since they control the big three? WWF, WCW, ECW... You loose your job as a wrestler in any of those three and you're doomed to the high school and state fair circuit.

--When you're real bad they call you a "Crackin' Jake"

By Head_Prosthesis on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 11:42 pm: Edit

When I was a little Head I had to entertain myself because I was an only child. I used to sing a song to myself...

"If I didn't have me,
What would I do.
If I didn't have me,
I'd only have you."

I guess it was solitary duet.

By Head_Prosthesis on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 11:29 pm: Edit

Come, sit down. Let's get to know each other a little better... You look ravishing and you smell (Sniff sniff) intoxicating. Is that the new fragrance by M.Roux "ABSCENT". I really like it.

You know I had this couch made out of bed sheets from a victorian infirmary. Oh yes it's true, it's true.

You know? You are looking so good, let's take this into the boudoir shall we...

By Head_Prosthesis on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 11:14 pm: Edit

Hello Supervixen, welcome to my thread. Let me show you my etchings... I'll put on the new Dizzy then I'll pour us a drink.

By Ariadnae on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 10:31 pm: Edit

Ah, wrestling...where else can a girl go to ogle half naked, overly-muscular men--some even over 30? Sure, they may not be "packing" much, but their bodies are lovely...

By Head_Prosthesis on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 10:25 pm: Edit

I think I'll grow my hair back out again so I can be the Stephanie McMahon that I want to be.

Stephanie Style

By Head_Prosthesis on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 09:37 pm: Edit

I think I'll name my first born Maple or Licorice Whip.

Maple Head, Licorice Whip Head.

Yeah. Goddamn!
I'm gonna have TWO babies.
Yeah! You hear that? Head's gonna be a daddy!!!

By Head_Prosthesis on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 07:30 pm: Edit

"BEYOND THE MAT" a fine documentary. I own the thing (on a drunken binge shopping at Meijer, I picked that up and Fight Club vhs, The Cook The Thief His Wife and Her Lover vhs) "Beyond" is at the top of my documentary list ...

Les Blank's are great too.
Burden of Dreams (1982)
The Blues Accordin' to Lightnin' Hopkins(1969)
Garlic is as Good as Ten Mothers (1980)

and my favorite Les film
Gap-Toothed Women (1987)

By Heiko on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 07:15 pm: Edit

If you happen to read a bodybuilding forum, look for a section on supplements and medication: You will find the extremest junkies/druggies there, you won't believe it. Those guys giving each other tips how to insert the needle to get the best effect from the new russian underground anabolics. You find questions like "I take this, this, this, this, this, that and those pills. Should I also take this and that to gain more weight?"
A pothead or an alcoholic is nothing compared to a real bodybuilder (I mean the extreme hardcore guys of course).
I've recently seen something that really hurt my eyes: women's heavyweight bodybuilding. Doesn't exist in the US because nobody is interested, in Europe there are a few crazy "women" who do it. Deep voices, cheeks look like they've been shaved, chin and nose having male proportions, not to forget hair-loss. Almost like in a Cunningham video ;-)

By Anatomist1 on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 06:33 pm: Edit

Does anybody know anything about the incident where Vince McMahon tried to punch Bob Kostas during a televised interview? I ran into a steroid-boy like him in the UW art school the other day. He was so puffed up and pissed off over nothing that I just couldn't take it personally... at least I didn't fall over laughing at him. Bodybuilding has to be one of the most bizarre perversions of humanity ever.

K.

By Artemis on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 02:41 pm: Edit

That's *Vince* McMahon of the WWF.

Jim was a quarterback with BYU and the Chicago Bears.

Sorry about that.

By Artemis on Friday, May 18, 2001 - 11:02 am: Edit

I recently saw, on (yes, I've said this before) a documentary on IFC or Sundance channel about wrasslers. It featured mostly "Mankind" and Jake the Snake Roberts.

Mankind is more or less a current star of the WWF and Jake, once a nation-wide star, is a crack addict, wrestling for $100 a show in western Nebraska.

To address the alleged fact that wrasslers don't get hurt in the ring: the cameras went into the dressing room. Mankind, after a "title bout" in which he felt the caress of a folding chair to the brain pan, taking stitches in the head. Jim McMahon, *owner* of the WWF and all buff on steroids (not satisfied with raking in the bucks, he actually entered the ring to be part in the soap opera years ago) also taking stitches to the scalp.

Later in "Mankind"'s house, they were showing him the tape. He seemed kind of freaked out by the whole thing, realizing that his children had watched that stuff.

By Head_Prosthesis on Thursday, May 17, 2001 - 11:40 pm: Edit

Today at work I took two chairs to the head. Right across the hairline above my forehead. Just like the Wrestlers do! I of course bled like a stuck pig too. I wasn't sure what the damage was exactly until I leaned over to pick up my glasses (which didn't break amazingly). I was leaning over and all of a sudden two big drops hit the floor and nice squirt creating a bloody grinning smiley face looking right back up at me. I put my hand to my forehead and could feel it running down my face. One of the drivers was back and started bitching at me about the condition of his his truck, he hadn't even looked at me. I said "Hey, I don't mean to be rude, but I think I need to go get a band aid or something". "HOLY SHIT!!!" He said.

So tonight while I was watching SMACKDOWN I felt like I was part of the show. Bleeding profusely from the scalp and screaming "MAH NAME IS STEVE AUSTIN! AHM THE WWF CHAMP! AH AIN'T SUPPOSED TA BE HERE!!!"

By Head_Prosthesis on Tuesday, May 15, 2001 - 08:40 pm: Edit

Ok no more files over 200k

By Head_Prosthesis on Tuesday, May 15, 2001 - 08:39 pm: Edit

We'll try this...

1,decapitated

By Head_Prosthesis on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 09:49 pm: Edit

Pataphysician that's a great story. Nothing is sacred, ever, with the WWF. Just like life. It's funny cause it's true.

By Head_Prosthesis on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 08:50 pm: Edit

You really have your finger on my pulse... I know you! You and me we're right here (pointing at my temple)...

By Alphasoixante on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 07:00 pm: Edit

The Dialectic of Head

Head Pros Thesis:
1

Head Anti Thesis:
2

Head Syn Thesis:
3

By Head_Prosthesis on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 06:07 pm: Edit

I always did love kissing her bitchy mouth.

By Head_Prosthesis on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 06:05 pm: Edit

Hey you found Auntie Edith? Very good. Haven't heard from her in awhile. Looks like she's under allot of stress. Tell her I said "Hi". Nice work McCloud.

By Pataphysician on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 10:34 am: Edit

Ya know, Mad Dog Vachon himself has a leg prosthesis. About ten years ago he was run over by a car and lost his leg. Well, I don't know if he lost it, exactly, but it was amputated. But that hasn't stopped him. Here's a story from Slam! Pro Wrestling magazine:

"In May 1996, Vachon, and other oldtimers were honored by the WWF at its In Your House pay per view. Though in-ring action may be out of the question these days, the Mad Dog did make his contribution. Diesel knocked over Vachon, and took his artificial leg. Diesel then whacked Shawn Michaels with it and then Michaels used it on Diesel while Vachon continued to get his tux all mussed up by lying flat on the floor, apparently oblivious to it all."

I hope that you can find inspiration in Mad Dog's example, Head Prosthesis. Don't let your differently-abledness be a roadblock to your dreams!

By Pataphysician on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 10:34 am: Edit

Ya know, Mad Dog Vachon himself has a leg prosthesis. About ten years ago he was run over by a car and lost his leg. Well, I don't know if he lost it, exactly, but it was amputated. But that hasn't stopped him. Here's a story from Slam! Pro Wrestling magazine:

"In May 1996, Vachon, and other oldtimers were honored by the WWF at its In Your House pay per view. Though in-ring action may be out of the question these days, the Mad Dog did make his contribution. Diesel knocked over Vachon, and took his artificial leg. Diesel then whacked Shawn Michaels with it and then Michaels used it on Diesel while Vachon continued to get his tux all mussed up by lying flat on the floor, apparently oblivious to it all."

I hope that you can find inspiration in Mad Dog's example, Head Prosthesis. Don't let your differently-abledness be a roadbolck to your dreams!

By Alphasoixante on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 08:37 am: Edit

Edith-Fore-Head-Prosthesis

efhead

By Alphasoixante on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 07:56 am: Edit

Forehead Prosthesis

forehead

By Alphasoixante on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 07:52 am: Edit

editheadprosthesis

By Pataphysician on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 07:41 am: Edit

Close, but no cigar. She's the daughter of Butcher Vachon, Mad Dog's brother.

By Alphasoixante on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 07:37 am: Edit

Edith Head Prosthesis

edith.bmp

By Head_Prosthesis on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 07:21 am: Edit

Mad Dog Vachon? I think that's Luna's father.

By Pataphysician on Monday, May 14, 2001 - 07:03 am: Edit

"Al Snow & Head"? Which one is Al Snow and which is you, Head?

My favorite wrestler? Mad Dog Vachon. I had the pleasure of making his acquaintance last year. Very pleasant fellow.

By Head_Prosthesis on Sunday, May 13, 2001 - 10:36 pm: Edit

AL SNOW OF COURSE!!!
Al and Head

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