Where is Artemis?

Sepulchritude Forum: The Absinthe Forum Archives Thru July 2001: Topics Archived Thru Jan 2001:Where is Artemis?
By Martin on Tuesday, January 02, 2001 - 04:02 am: Edit

I've been to Eat N Park before. It reminded me exactly like Denny's except the food and service was much better.

The trick to hanging out in places like that to meet interesting people is to always sit in the smoking section.. even if you don't smoke.


By Black_rabbit on Tuesday, January 02, 2001 - 03:30 am: Edit

You know, we used to have a wonderful little diner culture at an Eat N Park. We wrote, we talked, we played cards... loitering was a way of life. I had friends who didn't know my phone number. For awhile there, if you wanted to get ahold of someone, you had to go to Eat N Park. It was the place to be if you wanted a game of rummy, or to hear the latest poems or stories people had written, or just to kill time.

By Martin on Sunday, December 31, 2000 - 10:55 am: Edit

Hey.. I didn't actually fight the guy. I had enough sense to keep my cool and nothing bad happened. That's how it is every time...

Besides, if I fight had broken out I seriously doubt I would have actually knifed him. I'm not too keen on going to jail. I probably would have just punched him in the face. Anything I would have done would have been in self defense anyway.

I'm more concerned about what my friend might have done... he's a bit more bloodthirsty than I. Fortunately for most people, he's also very calm and down-to-earth. And it was a very good thing another of my friend's wasn't there... he's already a convicted felon for assault, and he's definately more excitable. Actually if he were there, I don't think anyone would have even started anything... he's scary looking.

I'm not sure you folks realize what people are like around here. There's alot of trouble makers just itchin' for trouble. I'm not one of them. I have yet to start a fight with anyone. I'm Mr. Calm and Collected. I'm just some guy hanging out having coffee. I can't help the fact that I enjoy taunting drunks. It's so much fun.

Punk Violence!!! Yeeeeeaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!


Sorry if you more sensitive folks were offended by my story.. but I did give a warning before that section of the post. I didn't post it to brag on my abilities to disfigure people... I merely found it an amusing story. The antics of stupid drunk people always make me laugh.

By Pikkle on Sunday, December 31, 2000 - 06:15 am: Edit

I got beat up by Mari Mayans last night... ooh,
aww, ouch.

By Don_walsh on Sunday, December 31, 2000 - 04:13 am: Edit

BTW I was treated altogether too snootily by a waiter at a hauighty-tauighty French restaurant in Vientiene, Laos, tonight. I wanted to pull his nose and slappy him silly with my purse, the little bitch. Needless to say I left him a highly inadequate tip and no phone number.

I was inspired by Martin.

Next time I will have my chauffeur thwash him most soundwy.

By Don_walsh on Sunday, December 31, 2000 - 04:04 am: Edit

Thanks for all the trailer-trash cutural insights, Martin. We are glad that you are out there protecting the Denn'y culture of Sharpsville/Kokomo from hooligans and ruffians. On the other hand you might well want to have a gander at the 'assault with a deadly weapon' statutes in Indiana, I am pretty sure hamstringing a guy would not only buy you a felony ADW charge if not attempted murder, but a nasty civil case (for crippling him for life) that would cost Martin Sr a lot. Like the family house. Doesn't matter your friend weilded the blade, you've been an accessory at least, probably main defendant, as the fight would have been with you.

Now maybe this could have been pleaded down to mopery, with intent to gawk, it all depends on who they were and who you are in the eyes of the local DA and so on. But I am here to tell you, I am not impressed. Why do you bring this sort of shit into for Forum? This isn't the Punk Violence Forum. Nor the Denny's PseudoCulture Forum. Hey, I've eaten at my share of Denny's. They're not that good -- as truckstops go.

By Anatomist1 on Sunday, December 31, 2000 - 03:03 am: Edit

Thanks Martin, for that heartwarming holiday tale. It's nice to know we have someone in our midst who's armed and just itching for an excuse to assault and horribly disfigure a stranger for no good reason. I wonder if they have internet access in prison...


By Martin on Sunday, December 31, 2000 - 12:45 am: Edit

I'm bringing a bottle of Herring and a bottle of Freixenet. And probably some vermouth too. I wanted to get some Avalanche mint schnapps to bring too, but I didn't make it to the liquor store before closing last night, and liquor stores aren't open on Sunday here because I live in a backward-ass redneck state full of self-rightious puritans. Pauvre moi! :-(

I bought my bottle last night and I just HAD to break into it as soon as I got my hands on it to give it a taste. Herring is quite good... better than one might expect from a brand that doesn't get much attention. It's not nearly as overwhelmingly anise as MM or Deva. Its pretty smooth-drinking too, even when sipped neat. I can taste the bitterness. I wouldn't consider the taste to be especially remarkable or interesting, its just very good. Kinda like Heineken beer... it doesn't do anything really new or different or amazing.. its just damn good!


So I'm sitting in Denny's last night, finishing my second glass of Herring, lapsing into a nice green fuzziness, when a bunch of obnoxious drunks come in and start causing trouble. First off, they were VERY loud. That was enough to give a very bad first impression to me and my friends. On top of that, they were quite billigerant and surly too. After eating, they broke into a riotous game of spitball wars. Needless to say, it was starting to get messy and the manager was none too pleased. Unfortunately, several of the drunks didn't seem to believe the manager was really the manager, so when she came over to tell them to chill out and clean up their mess, she was greeted with a nice drunken "who the hell are you?!" response. They quickly realized it was a good idea that they leave, but not before they get shit started with the manager. So half these fuckers are in the parking lot gesturing and chest thumping and inviting anyone to "bring it on", so the diminutive 4'11" ex-airforce manager goes out there and tells them she would love to oblige them. Of course, half of them get in their cars and leave.

Now I come into the story. Many of these guys are still left mind you... anyway, the main drunk who started shit with the manager walks back in and walks over to the table where two of my friends and I are sitting. He tells me to tell "my friend" (I still don't think he's realized she's the manager at this point) that he's sorry for causing trouble. My response is, "why don't you tell her yourself?" He continues like some kind of broken record saying that I should tell her for him and I continue saying he should do it himself. He realizes the conversation is going nowhere and turns to walk away. As he's walking away, remember I have two glasses of Herring in me, I very clearly and loudly say the word "Pussy". Because what kind of coward doesn't have the balls to go up to a woman and apologize for being an idiot? Well, he didn't even notice, but his friend sure did. So his friend walks up to me and starts in with the usual "what did you say? are you talking shit?" I informed him that the insult wasn't directed towards him but at his bitch-ass friend and he should mind his own business. He then started going into some macho bullshit thing about an insult towards his friend was the same as one towards him. I give him reasons why I think his friend is a "pussy". He's not too pleased by this and starts getting all threatening and asking if I want to "take it outside". First of all, its fucking cold outside. Secondly, fighting outside is for wusses, if someone wants to fight me, they should have the balls to do it inside... where all the handy objects are (chairs, coffee mugs, heavy glass ashtrays, kitchen knives, etc...). So I basically sat there very relaxed (well, relaxed LOOKING anyway) and grinned a nice absinthe grin at him daring him to bring it on. Of course, I punked him out and he left. Too bad, I had all that adrenaline worked up and no release for it. I should have done the whole "Go ahead.. make my day." thing with him. That probably would have provoked him enough to take a swing at me. Then the fun would have started... Firstly, my friend who was sitting right next to were he was standing (and the drunk was paying absolutely no attention to him, I had the guy pretty well distracted) would have pulled out his nice sharp knife and taken out the back of his knee. At that point he would have fallen to the ground (its kinda hard to stand when someone does that to you), I would have been left with four choices then: pull out the billy club from my backpack and start having fun with his face, or pull out the razor sharp knife from my pocket and start having fun with his face, or try my good ol' fists and start having fun with his face, or improvise and start grabbing random objects (heavy glass ashtray!) and start having fun with his face. You have to go for the face.. what's the point otherwise? It's also just about the quickest way to end a fight. Once a guy's face is messed up, he usually loses the fighting spirit pretty quick. I also really get off on the idea of disfiguring a pretty boy.

But fortunately, none of that happened. I feel sorry for that guy's girlfriend... he probably beat the shit out of her when they got home. Anyway, I came out of the whole thing with the satisfaction of having punked-out a half dozen guys just by sitting there and grinning maniacally at them. I think that Charlie Manson is definately onto something... staring wildly at people can be really intimidating. Yeah, I'm glad the situation cooled down without getting messy... those idiots were definately not worth going to jail for. But still... it would have been really fun to cut that guy's face to ribbons.

Its not uncommon for drunks to stumble into Denny's and make asses of themselves, but once every couple months or so, some idiot gets out of hand and there's all sorts of fun drama. That's why I enjoy hanging out there all night so much. You're never sure what's going to happen. It's alot of fun and the management doesn't seem to notice when I'm sitting there drinking absinthe (heh heh heh!). The Denny's culture is an interesting one indeed and you find it anywhere there's a restaurant open 24 hours that serves coffee.


By Petermarc on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 08:07 pm: Edit

an extended l'heure verte tasting with the
absinthes i have collected in the past 6 months...(as featured on the pierre verte thread)not sure how it will go over,(ša rend fou, n'est pas?) but i'm going to have fun...will post some notes, reactions, photos...

By Pikkle on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 05:02 pm: Edit

The bottle of La Bleue I'm bringing is all ready
half empty... heh.

By Thegreenimp on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 05:00 pm: Edit

I'm taking some Segarra and vintage glasses etc., and at mid-nite opening a bottle of La Bleue and sharing it with some friends.

By Anatomist1 on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 05:00 pm: Edit


I think you're right. I can see that the context appeared to foist the role of forum reformer upon you, when in fact you made no such manuevers. I apologize for the unprovoked assault. I cannot help my opinion, but there was no need to express it at this juncture.


By Pikkle on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 03:56 pm: Edit

I am hauling a bunch of absinthe to a party of
some hippy type friends, hopefully to win over
a few new converts... the last time the
response was less than overwhelming but I'd
only brought Deva... I've got more variety this
time so we'll see.

By Admin on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 03:40 pm: Edit

The die has been cast!

I think, until further notice, we should continue as we are. If, in a couple months, absinthe related discussions don't perk up, I will consider dividing the forum into two sections, but still leaving it as much a free for all as it is now.

My concern, as someone has noticed, is that a few legit absinthe posts have been lost in the miasma of our witty repartee. The forum has becoming increasingly busy and it might just be *easier* to spot and respond to absinthe posts if they had their own home, with random discussions taking place next door. I myself can barely read all the messages sometimes, and I read them in email. Trying to read 100+ a day is daunting!

Artemis, I knew you meant no criticism, but I saw this coming miles away, and you mildly brought it to the fore.

And to all, I have no intention of limiting conversation, like I said, I think it is lovely and vital to the communal (sometimes combative) feeling we all share. We have all been very good at self regulating, and I have no intention of becoming Tsarina Kallisti, but as we grow it might be a good idea to create areas for conversation.

Tomorrow is New Years Eve, what're ya'll up to?

By Pikkle on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 02:15 pm: Edit

Okay, as a one time newby/lurker, I personally
was at one time intimidated by most of the
threads that were soley of an absinthe related
nature because for one, i didn't feel educated
enough to join in and two, they got so
technical to a point that the uninitiated such as
myself would feel overwhelmed. I didn't even
visit for a long time because the whole thing
seemed as such and quite clique-ish to be
honest. Then in the past few months it
appears there have been more and more
off-topic type threads so to speak and this for
me was more or less a sort of welcome mat.
When I first found this site I got quite a bit of
my information from the guide and when I'd
saturated my brain with that, I moved onto the
forum. But for one who is just browsing or
curious and just happens upon a topic
specific forum such as this, it's like stepping
in the middle of someone elses conversation.
I don't really liken everyone here as such, but
has anyone here ever been to a Star Trek
convention? I haven't, partly out of fear of the
geek factor and partly because I'd be a little
overwhelmed by the devotion a lot of the
attendees displayed. I mean some of these
people really believe they are Vulcan and
Klingon. Yes, I know that is an exagerated
comparison but to the casual observer, even
the absinthe forum could be as intimidating if
that's all that was discussed, in depth and to
the extreme. It's good to loosen up, to talk
about everyday life and what we think, we all
have something in common, that's why we're
here and if we really want to welcome people,
we should keep it that way. My opinion, thank
you very much, say good night Gracie.

By Don_walsh on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 07:36 am: Edit

If I was a newby surfing in here and seeking absinthe information...and happened to do so in the last few weeks...I doubt if I'd bother a second time. The Portal, for all its dull as dishwater content, doesn't seem to ever be 95% way off topic.

I don't buy the "we've talked absinthe to death" argument at all. Anybody here think they know all there is to know about absinthe? I doubt it. If people need to go learn more before posting, go learn. If people are bored with talking absinthe, go someplace that isn't boring.

I AM NOT SAYING WE CAN'T DIGRESS. I'm just saying that it's sad that lately we can't find absinthe posts for all the irrelevant crap, and that includes my own irrelavant crap. I'm as guilty as anyone else. I would like to see the ratio restored in absinthe's favor. Not by fiat or imposed by Admin but by US ALL. Otherwise, I agree with Artemis, completely.

Anyway welcome, Josh.

By Cheese on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 07:07 am: Edit

Don, I'd disagree. This, regardless of what is posted/discussed here, will still be the absinthe forum because those posting/discussing are all absinthe devotees.

I've been lurking here for sometime and decided to make myself known now because I have seen this very thing happen on every message board I've been on. After a while you can only discuss thujone, distilling, etc.... so many times. If there isn't a lot of news or excitement (excluding everyone anxiously awaiting your products) the same old talk gets old. Anyway, as a reader mostly vs a poster, I'm enjoying my time here now as much as I ever was.


By Don_walsh on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 05:56 am: Edit

From my point of view, I'd be happier if most of the conversation had at least something to do with absinthe. The occasional off topic post or thread, who cares? But when everything is off topic and no one is talking absinthe, well, it ain't the Absinthe Forum anymore. Is it?

By Artemis on Saturday, December 30, 2000 - 05:49 am: Edit


Read the title of the thread.

I answered two questions, posed to me personally by Don Walsh.

Did I say anything should change about this forum? No. Did I criticize this forum? No. Since I knew that Don knew my physical location, I took his "where are you" to mean, why are you not here in the forum. I replied that I had not found any engaging conversations here lately. To be engaged, I have to not only be interested, I have to be informed. What I can't do well, I don't want to do at all. Not only am I not interested in haircuts and hangovers, I don't know anything about haircuts and hangovers. Therefore I do myself AND the participants a favor by staying out of those discussions.

Somebody, I think it was Black Rabbit, created a good analogy for this forum. He said there were lots of tables, people drinking absinthe, and if you wandered around, you would come up on conversations about all kinds of things, including but in no way limited to absinthe, and a lot of the conversation would just be drunken bullshit, too.
Or at least that's how I took what he said, and I accepted it. It's a perfectly acceptable way for this forum to be.

Now, if somebody wants to make me out a snob for making up my own mind about which table to try to join, or which to walk past, or for speaking my mind about why I passed or stayed, that's his privilege. To such a person, I say:

Come talk to me about ABSINTHE.

If you can.

Kallisti, you've been very responsive to my suggestions about this forum. I can't ask you to do any more than you already do. I certainly intended no criticism of anything you've already done. But the idea of skimming off-topic posts into their own chamber is an intriguing one. It would be interesting to see who ends up in which room. The absinthe room, and the, for lack of a better phrase, the NOT ABSINTHE room.

To all of you who politely joined this thread, taking it for no more than it was, before Kallisti posed her questions, I thank you for your indulgence and understanding of Don's and my own momentary public lapse into personal conversation.

By Lordhobgoblin on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 09:20 pm: Edit

"In the absinthe forum, let anarchy reign."

At the end of the day there's only so much you can say about a bottle of green booze. After a while it starts to be repetitive.

If people aren't interested in talking about haircuts, hangovers, guns, music, films, sex, drugs, politics, religion, half-baked philosophy, and the other important things in life then they can start a new thread, no-one's forced to join in.

At the end of the day we'll all talk about whatever we want anyway, and nothing beats a good argument.


By Pikkle on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 06:25 pm: Edit

Oh yeah, anarchy... I was just trying to help...
but since you insist!

By Marc on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 06:24 pm: Edit

Artemis says "haircuts and hangover stories are not my idea of engaging conversation".
Well, in the past few days the forum has certainly covered many more topics than the two he mentioned. It's been lively and fun around here. What's wrong with that? It seems appropriate
that a forum devoted to drinking absinthe should be freewheeling and a little loopy.

This forum has effectively been self-regulating.
Let's not get too anal about what goes where.
Life is too structured as it is. In the absinthe forum, let anarchy reign.

By Pikkle on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 03:48 pm: Edit

Yeah, but I like to hurl insults and indignations
in real time!

By Anatomist1 on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 03:42 pm: Edit

As perhaps the most locquacious, off-topic, Rodney Dangerfieldesque character here, I say save yourself the grey hairs, Kallisti. Actually, I think stray greys are sexy, but I digress. I realize I may ignite a few heads here, but I think the bottom line is that the forum is fine. The biggest improvement has already been made: mandatory registration. Artemis is the biggest snob this side of JKK, and I don't think anything should be based on whether or not he deigns to grace our banal conversations with his divine presence.


By Thegreenimp on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 03:34 pm: Edit

I can host a voice chat room on Firetalk, if anyone is interested drop me a line and I can set it up.

By Pikkle on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 02:56 pm: Edit

Yeah, start a chat room so us hot heads can
just shoot off at the mouths and the rest of the
absinthe crowd can channel their absinthe
related topics to a more moderate, intellectual
absinthe population... just don't let anyone
who's sensitive into the chat room!

By Admin on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 02:50 pm: Edit

Well Artemis, this poses an interesting discussion. I was talking with a non-forum friend the other day and he was wondering why I didn't moderate & corral threads more in the absinthe direction. My answers went thusly:

a) how male of you (controlling issues)
b) I like the community feeling random chatting gives the forum
c) I'm lazy
d) I would need an additional incredibly neutral person to help me moderate

But I do realize that recently we've been going off topic more voluminously than usual. I could split the forum into absinthe related & "other" and patrol people who go off topic in the absinthe section and move their messages. Any suggestions for this issue? I'm open to all easy answers!!!

By Martin on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 05:05 am: Edit

ohh.. silly me, I didn't think to ask whether you had a website or not. Thanks.


By Tabreaux on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 04:21 am: Edit

Keep checking www.bestabsinthe.com

You can put your name on a maling list at the website. You'll be notified via email of all events.

By Martin on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 04:14 am: Edit

I'm sure this has probably been mentioned someplace else before, but I'm too lazy to spend 3 hours looking for it... where will we be able to get Jade and how much will it cost?


By _blackjack_ on Friday, December 29, 2000 - 02:31 am: Edit

I think part of it is that we're all in kinda a holding pattern until Don and Ted's products come out. There hasn't been too much new going on in the absinthe world since we discovered Trenet et al. were actually absinthe.

By Artemis on Thursday, December 28, 2000 - 11:16 pm: Edit

Well, I posed an absinthe question a few days back, and Don was the only one to respond, and sarcastically at that.

That's alright. Things will come around. It's apparently the nature of this place - sometimes the crashing surf; sometimes the tide is low and the stinking seaweed is exposed. It's in between somewhere that absinthe discussion creeps in like an unexpected picnic on the sand.

By _blackjack_ on Thursday, December 28, 2000 - 10:32 am: Edit

Hey I posted something about absinthe yesterday and nobody responded...

Granted, I also posted two huge pictures of robots, but hey...

By Don_walsh on Thursday, December 28, 2000 - 10:02 am: Edit

Yeah, it's a wasteland.

By Artemis on Thursday, December 28, 2000 - 08:06 am: Edit

I will respond in the next 30 minutes.
I apologize (again) for my laziness.

As for this forum, haircuts and hangover stories are not my idea of engaging conversation. You get the picture.

By Don_walsh on Thursday, December 28, 2000 - 07:20 am: Edit

Where is stalwart Artemis and what is his new email address?

I am trying to send him a holiday message...can anyone help?

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