Staroplzensky Absinth

Sepulchritude Forum: The Absinthe Forum Archives Thru July 2001: Old Topics Archived Thru Sep 2000:Staroplzensky Absinth
By P.Jamma on Monday, June 26, 2000 - 10:13 pm: Edit

Yes, you must drive on happily to your demise... on a long enough time line, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero...

By Jack's Intestinal Fortress of Solitude on Monday, June 26, 2000 - 05:33 pm: Edit

"Jack's Whatever Uterus" thanks, I'll use it. I'm right there with tasty, tasty is a good thing.
Drink it and move on that's what I'm saying.
Otherwise you end up like my Grandfather with a SHIT LIST of restaurants and businesses that is a mile long. It really makes it hard to take him anywhere and enjoy his golden years. I guess if bitching makes you happy go for it.

On the other hand, "good art" is art that came from someone's suffering. (How "Goth"!!!) Happy art sucks.

By Black Rabbit on Monday, June 26, 2000 - 05:08 pm: Edit

I enjoy a glass of Sebors- I don't order much anymore as it is more expensive for me than other brands I like as much or more, but I always found it a high quality product (though there seemed to be a great deal of variation from batch to batch- each time I ordered it was a little different.)

And to Jacks Inflamed Uterus- even if a person does drink for self-destruction (I used to but don't any more) but even when I did, I liked my little doses of oblivion to be tasty... and anyhow, that being the case, I would rather get a heads up on something that tastes like paint thinner than not. Heck, I would just go buy some Nikolai (the plastic bottle shows the high quality) and avoid the whole business if I didn't care.

By Jakc's Silent Form of Protest on Sunday, June 25, 2000 - 08:27 pm: Edit

Ah yes, what a sad turn of the page. Once a drink for the poor and downtrodden. Now a chalice sought after by the middle class, middle children of history. Running up their charge cards to afford their pleasures...

Back to zero Space Monkeys.

By P.Jamma on Sunday, June 25, 2000 - 03:52 pm: Edit

I'm too poor to send anything to anyone at this point, what with all these empty absinthe bottles laying around... perhaps I could sell them on Ebay. Or maybe I'll just could send it to Jack's Swollen Ego and he just chug it on down without a word, grateful that he is able to bring on his own miserable downfall in the most tasteless of ways...

By Jack's Desperate Cry for Attention on Sunday, June 25, 2000 - 12:21 am: Edit

There you go Jammy! Send Tabreaux your bottle and let him try it.

Share it, don't spare it!

By tabreaux on Saturday, June 24, 2000 - 10:53 pm: Edit

I haven't tasted it yet, although I've tasted most of everything else at this point. I've gotten enough qualified opinions however, to know what to expect. Two persons were supposed to send me samples, but they never arrived.

By Jack's Reciprocating Prostate Thingy on Saturday, June 24, 2000 - 09:54 pm: Edit

Do NOT talk about it...

By Marc on Saturday, June 24, 2000 - 09:38 pm: Edit

Jack's raging bile duct,

"Drinking is a self- destructive process."

Not in my house it isn't. In fact, it is a proven fact that drinking in moderation is good for you.

Maybe you're a little punch drunk from repeated viewings of "Fight Club".

Marc's mellow frontal lobe

By Jack's Raging Bile Duct on Saturday, June 24, 2000 - 09:15 pm: Edit

I wonder what the world would be like if we all just stood back and enjoyed it. Instead of picking it apart and whining about the imperfections. Life is a work in progress people!
I'd like to add that drinking is a self destructive process. Complaining about the pain that might be involved is counter productive to the goal of drowning one's sorrow.

So the Staroplzensky sucks? Don't buy anymore!
Someone leaves it at your house? Well Mr. Jaded Jawed Jamma, either pour it down the drain or marvel at it's colorful deception and know that it's always important to do your homework(See Kyle's review on the buyer's guide).

Ooh child things are NOT going to get easier!!!

By Marc on Saturday, June 24, 2000 - 08:01 pm: Edit

I like Sebor's. It was the first "absinthe" I ever tasted, two years or so ago. I liked it then, I like it now. But, I always have a sentimental attachment to the "first time", whether it be sex, drugs, rock and roll or absinthe.

By P.Jamma on Saturday, June 24, 2000 - 07:12 pm: Edit

I have to say, I agree with Mr. Argon about the Staroplzensky. While it had a decent aroma, it was terribly bitter, with only the slightest hint of corriander to give it the least bit of distinction. And even after three sugar cubes, it still tasted of melted plastic. As for the color, it's the same thing as the words in music are to me, it only adds texture, it has no meaning.

One of the better methods I've found for the disposal of this product (say if it was accidentally given to you or you ordered it inadvertantly in a drunken stupor) is to mix it one part Starolplzensky to two parts Serpis or Deva. I prefer Serpis only because I don't like the flavor of that as well, and it gets a nice peach-gray louche to it. Come to think of it, I wouldn't waste Deva on this sad excuse for an enjoyable beverage. I can't say I'd give it to anyone I call a friend either and if I accidentally left it at a friends house, they might never call me again. Well, that's this louched out fool's two cents. Next caller...

By Marc on Saturday, June 24, 2000 - 06:43 pm: Edit


I am surprised that you have never tasted Sebor.
Why not? It's certainly readily available.

By tabreaux on Saturday, June 24, 2000 - 04:31 pm: Edit

None of the negative comments result from any ill will toward the Czechs. Personally speaking, Prague is one city in Europe I would make a point of visiting, and rest assured that has nothing to do with matters 'absinth'. The problem is that these products seem to be mostly bogus, and their promoters are are making all this misleading noise about 'original swiss recipe', and this gimmicky thing about lighting sugar on fire (to disguise the fact that it won't louche), making direct references to drugs, and other statements which are discrediting to say the least. You don't find that garbage associated with any other products aside from these. If that isn't deserving of criticism, than I wouldn't know what is!

From examining these products, a person can come to one of two conclusions:

(1) The persons making these products don't know anything about classic absinthe, despite what they claim.


(2) The persons know better, but are trying to mislead the consumer.

The marketing of the Czech products gets a 'A' for effectiveness, but the products get an 'F' for quality and authenticity. Sebor is the best Czech product, but how does that stack up in real world comparisons? Only you can decide for yourself. I haven't yet tasted Sebor, so I cannot comment first-hand, and I'd rather leave it to those that have to speak.

By brotherben on Saturday, June 24, 2000 - 01:41 pm: Edit

I am a bit confused about the anti-Czech movement. I admit that Sebor isn't "all that" when it comes to Absinthes, and I agree that Deva and (my fav, too bad about the thujone controversy) Mari are superior, but damn it isn't all that bad. I just got a bottle of the "Sebor strong" in and it was rather nice...just a little nippier than the 55% version. I don't like the lack of subtlety in the flavor, and the fact that it doesn't louche...but I can drink it, and how!
I just won't buy much of it because it's cheaper to order two bottles of deva from Spirits for 65 bucks (including shipping).
The point is that many people (who I admit are more knowledgeable on the subject than I)dismiss the Czech brands without much comment, but drinking sebor isn't the end of the, Schultz is another story (Hills I haven't tried).
Anyway, the Sebors are (IMHO) much undervalued in this forum. Yes, I am sure some people will tell me I haven't developed a tongue for Absinthe yet, or that none of what I drink is Absinthe blah blah blah; but if there are any newcomers on this list just remember that personal experience beats theory every time.
BTW, I can't wait for Don and Ted's stuff to hit the market. I trust Ted's opinion especially and I think we are all in for a pleasant treat...


By Grizlupo on Friday, June 23, 2000 - 04:20 pm: Edit

Neatest bottle on the market!

Too bad it confronts one with the "I Could drink this... but I really need some paint removed..." question.

Seriously, it is not that bad, but there is just much better stuff out there.

By Don on Friday, June 23, 2000 - 04:37 am: Edit

Arrghhh! Davey Jones' liquor! Shiver meee timberss!

How d'ya think Old Blind Pew got blind?

Another cancelled Czech!

By Chrysippvs on Thursday, June 22, 2000 - 11:21 pm: Edit

La peril Verte

By tabreaux on Thursday, June 22, 2000 - 10:15 pm: Edit

Sounds about as enticing as spoiled milk.

By Argon 39 on Thursday, June 22, 2000 - 09:42 pm: Edit

Here's my armchair review of the Staroplzensky Absinth Pilsner L'or.

It's a beautiful bottle, and the color is spectacular. Though it doesn't louche very well, it looks great in the glass, almost perfect. The taste is very good until swallowed. Then it's taste burns rubber through the mouth like a screaming batch of dry heaves. You dont even notice the 70% alchohol.

Taking wormwood extract in grapefruit juice makes for a better apertif. It's an instant louche too.

If you like bitter. This Ab's for you.

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