Betina is wonderful

Sepulchritude Forum: The Absinthe Forum Archive Thru March 2002: Archive thru February 2002:Betina is wonderful
By Sicboy13 on Thursday, February 07, 2002 - 04:05 pm: Edit

Eddy Murphy is funny, ok?

By Chevalier on Wednesday, February 06, 2002 - 06:28 am: Edit

Don't you dare forget Carrot Top!

my picture

By Pablo on Wednesday, February 06, 2002 - 06:19 am: Edit

Damn! You ARE evil!

(at least its not Pauly Shore movies. Pauly, if you are out there reading this, i'm gonna kick your ass on general principal)

By Don_Walsh on Wednesday, February 06, 2002 - 06:09 am: Edit

YAHAHAHA! and for my secret weapon....72 hours of Eddie Murphy tapes!!!

We'll start with TRADING PLACES and finish with COMING TO AMERICA and before we're through you will be muttering to yourself in the voice of James Earl Jones...

(cackles evilly)

By Nolan on Wednesday, February 06, 2002 - 04:40 am: Edit

Well,I am back on the web to day!!SUH!! Buggy whippins and senator Claghorn tapes don't bother me!! we had all that in grammer school!! Tar and feathers? Well Suh,you bring the tar and I will bring the feathers.As you have so graciously pointed out,us suthreners will stick to those we like/lak.Well,Betina is a friend of mine,not an aquaintance,she is a friend,As in I know her,I am not questioning your position on friends,I am only saying I stand by my own friends.I do not know the other competitor I mentioned in my previous post.I was only showing that there is a difference shown to some on this forum as compared to others.I suh!! have eaten tons of moon pies and have drank bath tubs full of R-AH-O-C...BUT!!!... I DRAW THE FUCKIN LINE AT BEIN TIED TO A CHAR AND BEIN FOWERCED TO WATCH GOOD TIMES TILL I CRACK!!! THAT SUH IS CRUEL AND UNUSAL PUNISHMENT!! ARE YOU A CRUEL AND UNUSUAL MAN? I fear that this is so,SUH!! I would rather be stripped nekkid,hawg tied and throwed into a padded cell,and forced to listen the fuckin pina colada song,24/7 for six months than to be tied to a char and forced to watch good times till I crack!!! this Suh,is disturbing,I would have no choice but to turn tail and run for the hills to my kinfolk,[even special forces are cautious around these inbred sumbithches!!}I fear you have been in southeast asia a little too long SUH!!You
should come back to visit yoah home in the deep south mo often!!...P.S. YOU ARE A QUICK WITTED AND CRUSTY OL BAHSTAHD!!

By Baz on Saturday, February 02, 2002 - 09:26 am: Edit

Ah prefer mah bourbon strait, but thanks for the invite...
Many's the day that an RC and moon pie were the only break I got out in the tobacco field. I personally don't miss those days very often!

By Don_Walsh on Friday, February 01, 2002 - 10:07 am: Edit

Obviously a gentleman of Dixie! Welcome, suh, and be seated here high above the cheap seats and pay no attention to the mumblings of damnyankees. Can I get you a mint julip? (rings for servant)

By Baz on Friday, February 01, 2002 - 07:35 am: Edit

mmm... mmm....!
RC and a moon pie! Now that's lunch!!!!

By Pikkle on Thursday, January 31, 2002 - 06:17 pm: Edit

Of all people, a business man downing another for turning a buck... honest or not, it still puts food in our mouths and Jaguars in our garages, whooohaahahaaa

By Don_Walsh on Thursday, January 31, 2002 - 03:39 pm: Edit

Hey, Nolan, I'm a plain spoken good ole suthrun boy (and from Nola) too, and for that matter, so is the FORMER other seller you are referring to as being defended when UNJUSTLY attacked. Yes, he is so defended. By me. We suthrun plain spoken good ole boys stick together. Suh. You sound like a carpetbagger, damned Yank, to me, siding with that desert drinker of other people's vital fluids. Why, I bet you never drank an RC Cola or ate a Moon Pie. Scalliwag! I'd give ya the business end of a buggy whip if I wuzn't 10,000 miles away in SOUTH East Asia. Get the tar and feathers! Get the Senator Claghorn videotapes! I'm gonna tie this malefactoring Northrunner to a chair and make him watch GOOD TIMES till he cracks! Spy foh the NAACP* I'll wager. A rope! Somebody get me a rope!

*(Natl Assoc for the Advancement of Colored Pastis).

By Wolfgang on Thursday, January 31, 2002 - 07:47 am: Edit

Nolan, let me hold the door for you...

By Rimbaud on Thursday, January 31, 2002 - 12:29 am: Edit

Shall we show Newbie Nolan to the official Sepulchritude Absinthe Forum cyber-guillotine as punishment for shouting and/or "trolling"?

By Destiny on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 11:47 pm: Edit

Note to self: Dump your Mormon friends, they're worthless.

I can find everything I need, just having problems finding the two French exports.

By Don_Walsh on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 11:05 pm: Edit

That should read:

Try the Buyers Guide.

By Don_Walsh on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 11:03 pm: Edit

The the Buyers Guide. It has been quoting 50 Swiss francs as the local price for La Bleue since before I ever got my hands on any. That is approx $30 US.

And when I did get a friend to buy some for me, that's what the price was, and still is.

I got my Sebors (yuck!) and La Fee the same way, by handcarry via friends.

By Destiny on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 10:38 pm: Edit

I've never ordered from Betina but it's obviously just plain ol' supply and demand that keeps her in business. What drives me nuts is that I know of no other place to get LaFee or Oxygenee, so if I want to try either of these, I have no other choice than to pay the $150. I find it strange that I can't find either of these commercial brands elsewhere but I can easily find a *reasonably priced La Bleue.

*Not $30 as in what Don calls reasonable, but what the rest of us suckers call reasonable.

By Larsbogart on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 09:09 pm: Edit

nolan, you can send a present but please dont send any phony absinthe spoons or poisonous bottles of #2.
larsbogart

By Verawench on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 08:55 pm: Edit

Scratch that, I think I'm gonna go to bed instead.

By Verawench on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 08:54 pm: Edit

This entire place is getting more and more surreal, if that's at all possible.

I'm gonna go moonshinin' with southernwood, I'm going to poison all you bastards with wicked Tejas brew.

By Nolan on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 08:11 pm: Edit

Well,I am gonna have to put my two cents in here.Now,I am not Betina and I don't live under any fuckin bridge,but it seems that it is o.k. to slam Betty on this forum, but I see that certain of her competitors get defended when they are called into question.This was on another thread.It just seems to me that if you don't feel like fuckin waiting around on an overseas source then you buy from an in country source.If you don't then you order from overseas and wait till you get it,or if you order from some in country sources you apparently wait anyway.I wouldn't know
because I only deal with Betina.Just in case someone does not read this post with care I will
say it once again.I AIN'T BETINA!! I AM A GOOD OL SOUTHERN BOY AND I CAN BE PRETTY PLAIN SPOKEN IF CALLED ON TO DO SO.I don't find Betinas price that controversial.If you can't or don't want to pay what she asks then buy somewhere else.OH,by the way,a belated HAPPY BIRTHDAY LARSBOGART!!

By Larsbogart on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 06:27 pm: Edit

my sources at the vatican have informed me there is more to this story that meets the eye. evidently, the spoons which at one time came into the possesion of the blessed mother have miraculously transformed into solid gold. this has set chins wagging in vatican city and there is now a pilgrimage to the desert in the hope of an eternal spring [customs is not onto this divine intervention...yet].
already for sale:
holier than thou sugar cubes and robette shrouds. more merchandise to follow.

By Larsbogart on Wednesday, January 30, 2002 - 09:39 am: Edit

danny bonaduce [formerly of the partridge family] has taken the lead from our president [george bush] and fallen off the wagon also. he will be posting his own true to life experiences with B.E. soon so be on the lookout. he did not, i said did not, recieve any rebate or anything free from the desert.
partridge mom, shirley, however is circling the desert in a last bid to circumvent dannys fall. the rest of the partridge klan couldnt give a shit and will continue with their tough love stance.

By Sicboy13 on Thursday, January 24, 2002 - 08:45 am: Edit

p.s.
add two orders of hot & spicy lamb-ey nipple chops with sweet & sour sauce...(SICK DAYS RULE!)
p.s.s. Bela Lugosi's dead....

By Sicboy13 on Thursday, January 24, 2002 - 08:29 am: Edit

word to big bird

By Destiny on Thursday, January 24, 2002 - 12:55 am: Edit

Now that Betina's #2 is gone (the La Bleue, you sickos!), I've heard that she will have some Emile Pernot and Armand Guy. Does anyone know how might these compare to her #1 and #3.

BTW, very clever Don. A result of Jade's tertiary effects?

By Head_Prosthesis on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 11:04 pm: Edit

Fucked up like a family full o' retards on crack...

Hey, Marc how's about we go walk the bald chihuahua...

By Marccampbell on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 11:01 pm: Edit

sic,

its okay. welcome. we're all fucked up here. in a good way.

By Head_Prosthesis on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 10:59 pm: Edit

She's as sweet as she can be...

By Sicboy13 on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 10:56 pm: Edit

Maybe I should introduce myself as I seem to have stumbled into a world in which I know nothing about...I am a newbie & dont mean step on toes here. Out of the three times I have ordered, my experience with Betty was the most favorable to plan, quick & no hassels, I'm not anybody's spokesperson.

By Head_Prosthesis on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 10:22 pm: Edit

You are the King of Rock, there is none higher...


GODDAMN DON!!! I wish I still had all those SOF's from the 80's... Pure Afghan Freedom Fighter Issues...

By Don_Walsh on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 10:14 pm: Edit

1. I was cold sober (dammit)! I guess I was just feeling frivolous.

2. It was composed at the keyboard without editing. I believe I reconsidered maybe two words, but it was while the words were being typed, so I don't really consider <5 backspaces as 'editing'.

3. Beatification/beautification was deliberate. At first I was going to attribute that one to His Eminenece Cardinal Chong, but then I synthesized a different character to say it, then inserted Cardinal Chong later in the ramble.

4. Hopefully Betina took this in a spirit of fun. I have nothing against her, but I do wish she'd ease up on the fake posts and scare tactics.

By Verawench on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 07:19 pm: Edit

Brilliant!

By Mvario on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 06:37 pm: Edit

Just wondering, was the substiution of beautification for beatification intentional or freudian?

By Wolfgang on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 06:29 pm: Edit

Ho boy! another belly cramp LOL!

I think Don is probably sampling some holy batch tonight as he is obviously very inspired ;-).

By Tavarua on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 04:00 pm: Edit

The scare tactics do wear old, but she is a nice person non-the-less.

By Don_Walsh on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 03:35 pm: Edit

Problem is, the only persons who percives (and trumpets) any 'risk' to speak of in the international ordering, are Betina, and a tiny number of other domestic resellers like Absinthe Doctor, and of course, Betina's legion of transparent personas like this fool below, who insult our intelligence with robotlike 'uncolicited testimonials' on a regular basis i.e., whenever there is a dip in her sales.

No, Tavarua, I do NOT mean you.

I have nothing against Betina, I am just tired of her SCARE TACTICS which fly in the face of everyone's experiences, it's a smarmy ploy, but it's her only one, and she plays it to death.

By Tavarua on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 03:29 pm: Edit

Betina is a nice person and she provides a great service. Would I pay two hundred dollars for a litre of La Bleue. No. But I am sure there are those that have more money than me and don't want to risk the overseas market. And if that was me, I wouldn't hesitate in dealing with Betty.

By Don_Walsh on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 02:57 pm: Edit

Dateline: 2075 AD

ROME: The Vatican office in charge of investigating candidates for beatification has confirmed that long-proposed American lay sister Mother Betina of New Mexico may soon be elevated to sainthood on an unprecedented fast track under liberalized guidelines approved by His Holiness Pope Ordinaire I only days ago.

Mother Betina, who passed away a decade ago at the age of 111, is widely regarded by the world's Catholic faithful as a uniquely unselfish and devoted individual and several unconfirmed miracles are attributed to her, which are under scrutiny by the Holy See.

Cardinal Wolfgang J.Artemis, Archbishop of Albuquerque, stated that "I have never known a candidate more worthy of beautification than Mother Betina."

Vatican sources, speaking on condition of anonymity, have confirmed that the investigation into the apparently miraculous events surrounding Mother Betina are well under way and so far, the rigorous scrutiny of the Holy Office has been unable to debunk them.

Hundreds have attested to the "Miracle of the Half a Thousand La Bleue Bottles" in 2014. While returning from a pilgrimage to Switzerland's Neuchatel Cathedral, Mother Betina placed only 12 bottles of La Bleue, a local holy water reputed to have supernatural curative powers, in her suitcase. But upon returning to New Mexico, Mother Betina was able to distribute exactly 500 liters of the blessed beverage to the grateful faithful, before the suitcase finally was emptied. It was this incident which first vaulted Mother Betina to international Catholic attention as she was able to use the donations of the faithful to start construction of the Fountain of St.Absinthium, which enshrines a five foot plaster image of the Blessed Virgin of Taos, known to inexplicably shed tears of 72 proof herbal extracts at times of world crisis, especially when Mother Betina has run out of holy water.

The shrine is now a pilgrimage destination for over 600,000 of the faithful every year who come in search of healing, renewal of faith, and a good buzz.

Cardinal Artemis refused to comment on rumors that several relics of the potential Saint Betina are in the possession of the Church and being couriered to the Holy City. Supposedly these include several miraculously preserved Cinzano screwcaps, a bubblejet printer on which icons of the La Bleue were lovingly fashioned in precise imitation of the orthodox Neuchatel style, and the tongue of Mother Betina's beloved Alsatian companion, Heinrich, as well as several short,curly hairs believed to have come from the actual person of Mother Betina, although independent DNA confirmation still remains to be made public.

It is not known whether, as reported by L'Osservatore Romano, the hairs were found in proximity to the Blessed Tongue of Heinrich, as the relic is known to the believers.

Papal nuncio to the United States, Cardinal Robert Chong III, also was mute about reports that yet another purported relic of Mother Betina has been unearthed. A 10 x 10 cm scrap of tanned sheepskin lnown as the Beatific Fleece of St.Vlad, was originally part of the left hindquarters of a domesticated woolly which was a family pet of the Australian honorary consul in New Mexico, William 'Stumpy' Kelly.

The sheep accidentally wandered from its family home into the New Mexico desert, and was missing for a week. Eventually, a search party found the nearly dead animal precisely where Mother Betina predicted it could be found, knowledge she said came to her from St.Francis of Assisi in a vision after she performed a quality control check on some Swiss holy water.

The sheep was nearly drained of blood and bore the marks of numerous vampirihs bites like those of a giant bat or, as one pathologist commented, an impossibly large desert-dwelling leech. The rescue of the animal, ans its survival, are popularly believed to be miraculous, and Mother Betina's intercession, further evidence of her trunk line to the Throne of Thrones.

By Sicboy13 on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 02:23 pm: Edit

I know good peoplewhen I talk to them, that's all--I've dealt w/more than a few people & I call it like I see it

By Don_Walsh on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 02:13 pm: Edit

Oh, yeah, Betty is going to be canonized one day, as a great humanitarian and saint she ranks right up there with Mother Theresa.

By Wolfgang on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 10:50 am: Edit

Did she gave you a rebate in exchange for your forum review of her good services ? :-)

By Sicboy13 on Wednesday, January 23, 2002 - 10:41 am: Edit

I am fairly new to the world of absinthe and I've only tasted 3 different kinds; Deva, Logan, and the wonderful Suisse la Bleue #1--I had the pleasure of dealing with Betina for the latter & I had done my homework after my experience with the Logan 70%, the customer service is excellent & all questions I had were answered in a matter of minutes, not days like some sites.

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