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The Fée Verte Absinthe Forum - The Oldest, Largest, Most Authoritative Absinthe Forum. > The Monkey Hole > Arts & Philosphical Sundries
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Deluge
All right folks... Deluge fucks up again!

It has been a very long time since my last post, I apologize for my aloofness, but alas my life has been in utter shambles and I have been unable to think straight let alone post on the board.

I just ended a seven-year relationship with my girlfriend! We have had some major issues over the past two years so I decided to make the break. She wanted to break up on two other occasions over the last 3 years due to her finding new boys to fancy… So this breakup is not coming out of the blue. We always seemed to find a way to work through our troubles and move on but this time it was a little different. We finally got to the point in the relationship where we either had to get engaged or break up. She just finished grad school and she wanted to move out of state together. I was/am not ready to do this. I asked my self why I could not commit to this relation ship and I simply realized that we were just not meant to be. This is the foundation of my problem and I have now really done a number on myself and everyone around me.

My relationship ended a month ago. Since then my best friends girlfriend and I developed feelings for one another. Fuck! So the bigger problem…they were both my roommates. Now my best friend has moved out and wants never to see me again. I totally understand that. I fucked up and deserve all the shit coming to me. I got kicked out of the band, I lost all of my friends, and so all in all I have now burned every bridge in my life. Argh! I feel as if there is no place left to turn… To make things worse last night my ex-best friends ex-girlfriend told me that we should distance ourselves entirely for the time being till we can work all this out. I know, I know, this is all so very grade school nonsense but my heart is a total mess. I really fell for her hard and I don’t know what to do! I respect her wish for distance, but I don’t want to loose her. She says that she is not going back to her ex and that there is still hope for the two of us so I just need to wait it out… Damn!

celticgent
but more importantly, there was a LIGER on good morning america earlier.

a fucking LIGER for chrissakes.

unfortunately, i had to leave for work, so i didn't get to see if it had magical skills.
Deluge
Fuck, I missed a Liger!

God damn!

Artemis
Dear Abbsinthe,

My dog died, the finance company repossessed my trailer, and I've got the down to tails and dregs again blues. I'd kill myself, but the box of cheap Chinese ammo my cousin Earl gave me misfired, every round. Oh and the revenooers found my still down in the holler and busted it up.

Your friend,
Cletus
justabob
It's no wonder I can't write country music. My life isn't fucked up enough. How about this.

I like Martin guitars
Honky tonk bars
Cuban cigars
and fast race cars

But there is only one thing I love and that is you.

Key of g

SnakeHead
You came to the right place grasshoppah.

Why do you think the Blues and getting drunk go oh-so-well together?

I reccomend a bottle and http://www.wwoz.com/.
Deluge
Dear absinthe,

My fish died...I creid...Fare ye well, fare ye well!

So much for hallelujah! Well met! Amen. Amen.

You lover,

Milk Tea.
Absomphe
Czech out the" P. S.", Dr. Lovelorn. harhar.gif
Deluge
Oh yeah, the P.S.!

I have been gone for a while!!! frusty.gif
Hiram
And the seven-year-itch strikes again. It's biological you know. You can get around it, but it's hard work.

Sorry you fucked up this part of your life, but it's temporary.
Breson
I recommend that you take 16 oz's of bourbon at least once a day for the next 2 weeks. Oh and go find something to screw immediately. It should all be better in a month or so

---Dr. Phil Goode--
Deluge
Yeah,

I would like to drink right now but I fear it may open a very sad part of me that I don't really want to deal with.

I will deal with the situation at hand and focus on getting well. How do I do it? I have no idea.


Absence makes the heart grow fonder right?
Absomphe
It's supposed to be "Absinthe makes the fond grow harder."

You really are in a fucked up place aren't you?

You'd better order some more green booze.
Deluge
Don Abs,

I've never been more fucked up.
Absomphe
Fear not, lad, simply lean on an old cliche...

Whatever doesn't kill you, is bound to make stronger (even if it's kickin' the livin' shit out of you, at the moment).

Deluge
You a the third person to tell me that today!

That is amazing.


Oh, it is going to be a long and lonley weekend.


I wish I had a home computer...


bye for now.
Jack Batemaster
Jeebus, not in here too. wacko.gif Grow some balz™ man!
G&C
INDEED!
frusty.gif
Perruche_verte
Deluge, you'll survive. Drink in measured doses.
Breson
I still stand by my reccomendation of bourbon and some strange. Apply liberally in either order.
Donnie Darko
QUOTE (Deluge @ Feb 18 2005, 01:49 PM)
I will deal with the situation at hand and focus on getting well. How do I do it? I have no idea.

Simple: Write a pitch for a reality TV show where it's scripted that 2 best friends fight over the same girl. Instant money!

And hire yourself as the casting director, and bed every girl that aspires to be an actress. Instant heart.gif !
grey boy
Who's the puppet?

Deluge<--->Badger

Or maybe they should get together
and cry in their beers.
jacflash
QUOTE (Deluge @ Feb 18 2005, 10:26 AM)

My relationship ended a month ago. Since then my best friends girlfriend and I developed feelings for one another. Fuck! So the bigger problem…they were both my roommates. Now my best friend has moved out and wants never to see me again.

Just date both of 'em. And don't get upset if they date others (like, say, your best friend) while they're dating you, too. Clearly, y'all just need to let go of this possessiveness thing. Nobody ever really owns another's soul, after all... why pretend? You'll be happier, they'll be happier, your best friend will be happier... what's to lose?
Absomphe
QUOTE (grey boy @ Feb 21 2005, 11:51 PM)
Who's the puppet?

Deluge<--->Badger


A few of us met Deluge, so Badger must be the puppet.
Deluge
Well, I am back from absentia... My heart still hurts but uncle Jack will be proud to know that I did have a night on the town...

Sometimes I think I am a puppet...

vagina.gif
Absomphe
There's another, less flattering, term than puppet for your condition, Cyrano. harhar.gif wink.gif
Conju
My left hand keeps me out of that kind of trouble,


for now...
Conju
Just go kick the living shit out of eire, mulletman, and kingdubhda. That should make you feel better.


My left hand keeps me out of that kind of trouble,


for now...
G&C
Time to cut off your left hand.
DenSetsu
While I've never actually been with a girl seven years and then break up with her, so I can't really say that I know what you're going through, I do know a little about heartbreak, and I listen to quite a bit of country. Even if your new girl doesn't come back there's always going to be someone better out there.

And if you do meet the one, there's bound to be someone that seems better, but probably isn't. Just make sure she feels the same about you.

Keep your head up man. abs-cheers.gif
Deluge
I have been listening to Gram Parsons & Emmylou Harris's version of "Sweep Out The Ashes In The Morning" damn that song gets to me right now. sleepy.gif
Jack Batemaster
Is this an Absinthe or Big Juicy Pussy™ forum? I can't tell anymore.
Absomphe
Keep on keepin' clam.
Absomphe
QUOTE (Green & Cloudy @ Feb 22 2005, 03:56 PM)
Time to cut off your left hand.

And no cauterizing the wound, that's cheating.
Conju
I'll be sure to get right on that.

OW

oky, my l hn i on n i h bloo ll ov h kybo.
Absomphe
Now you're finally starting to make some sense, Boggles! shock.gif
caesar
QUOTE (Conju @ Feb 22 2005, 09:52 PM)
I'll be sure to get right on that.

OW

oky, my l hn i on n i h bloo ll ov h kybo.

Conju, I just spit Suisse Verte all over my keyboard!


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahahahahahha!
SloppyGoat
That sounds very similar to something that happened to me when I was young. I figured out the the girl I was in love with was a psycho fucking bitch from hell, and she was the one who was fucking up my life, and ruining all my artificial happiness! I was just too stupid to see it at the time. Once I realized that she was actually a stupid torturing whore, my entire perspective on life changed.

Don't fall in love with your best friend's girlfriend. Bad idea. Dumping your chick (or being dumped) was the least of your problems. Seek professional help, before the urge to kill yourself creeps in. Don't fall in love with your psychiatrist either. That's also bad.

If your best friend was really your best friend, you'll still be friends after this is over, but you'll have to grovel for what you've done.

In the meantime, I find that bashing old TV's and small household appliances with a sledge hammer is one hell of a frustration release.
sixela
QUOTE (Deluge @ Feb 18 2005, 06:26 PM)
but I don’t want to loose her.

You're gripping her too tight, that's for sure¹.

If you're coming out of a seven year relationship, though, I'm sure I'd let the dust settle before rushing into a new one, so her advice may not be all that bad. And if you're losing her: better lose her now than in seven years' time.

--
¹Do not mistake a spelling flame for advice or philosophy.
sixela
QUOTE (Hiram @ Feb 18 2005, 08:45 PM)
And the seven-year-itch strikes again. It's biological you know.

I'm so fast it only hit me after five years.

Nothing a good bitchslap from my then-grilfriend-now-wife couldn't cure, though.

So, Hiram, are these seven years itches recurrent? If so, I must have missed a crisis.
Absomphe
Tish and I have been married for seven and a half years now, and I have yet to put calamine lotion on my shopping list.
sixela
Yeah, but you're slow. I'd buy it if I were you.
Absomphe
Who you callin' slow, Godzilla breath? ranting.gif
le Gimp
QUOTE (SloppyGoat @ Mar 1 2005, 12:09 PM)
...snip.....

In the meantime, I find that bashing old TV's and small household appliances with a sledge hammer is one hell of a frustration release.

45-70 Rifle loaded with 500gr lead bullets and black powder.

12" diameter 1/2" thick steel gong suspended from a saw-horse at 100 Yards.

Stop firing when your shoulder can't take it any more or you start feeling euphoric from hitting it 10 times in a row.
MrsAbsomphe
QUOTE (SloppyGoat @ Mar 1 2005, 09:09 AM)
That sounds very similar to something that happened to me when I was young. I figured out the the girl I was in love with was a psycho fucking bitch from hell, and she was the one who was fucking up my life, and ruining all my artificial happiness! I was just too stupid to see it at the time. Once I realized that she was actually a stupid torturing whore, my entire perspective on life changed.


Do you have to work at being such a misogynist asshole, or does it come naturally?

Sure, call the "woman" (more likely the girl who sat in front of you in tenth grade English class, since I still don't buy you being in your mid-thirties) a whore, a psycho fucking bitch and all the rest.

Fact, shitheel: YOU WERE INVOLVED WITH HER. What does that make you? Oh, yeah, a SloppyGoatFucktard.

About the only thing I agree with is this: "I was just too stupid..."

Here's a newsflash, assmunch: you still are.

Now go chomp on an aluminum can.

---Tish looking-up.gif
sixela
Ah -- that flamethrower really becomes the lady worshippy.gif .
Absomphe
I'm sure her students would agree with you, Sixer.

But she's just a little fuzzy kitten, at home! abs-cheers.gif
Breson
QUOTE
Sure, call the "woman" (more likely the girl who sat in front of you in tenth grade English class, since I still don't buy you being in your mid-thirties) .

If it was the tenth grade, the memory is still very fresh as it was a year or 2 ago.
DenSetsu
abs-cheers.gif
Breson
Maybe if it was
QUOTE
4:20
you could go
QUOTE
smoke a few tokes
or drink
QUOTE
the occasional bottle of Jager
and be over this psycho bitch in no time, if not
QUOTE
Can't we all just smoke a bong?

I am sure you can meet another girl at the next all ages hard core show
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