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The Fée Verte Absinthe Forum - The Oldest, Largest, Most Authoritative Absinthe Forum. > The Monkey Hole > The Newgate Calendar
Oxygenee
Just in case the Large Hadron Collider, due to be switched on today, does in fact create a black hole which destroys the entire planet, I thought I should just say that it's been a real pleasure knowing y'all, and I wish you the best of luck wherever and whenever in the space-time continuum your bosons once again reassemble into some sort of carbon-based life form.

Also, Pontarlier glasses will be back in stock next week from Absinthe Spoon. I appreciate that in the circumstances this may, or may not, be useful information.






QUOTE
At 8.15pm GMT, the switch will be flicked on the Large Hadron Collider (LHC), a giant particle accelerator built by European science organisation CERN.

The machine will smash atoms in the hope it can uncover some of the secrets of the Big Bang.

Opponents fear the $A9.3 billion machine, which will generate temperatures of more than a trillion degrees centigrade, could create a black hole that could swallow the planet.

One theory suggests that after a series of random earthquakes, Earth would start to crack up; molten lava would wash over the land and the seas would start to boil; mega-hurricanes and cyclones would level buildings and forests; and eventually, mountains would crumble as Earth's crust continued to disintegrate.

Another theory is more simple but arguably more terrifying: Earth would be destroyed in an instant (about 1/20th of a second), simply vanishing from space. Within a few minutes, the rest of the solar system would allegedly follow.
Provenance
Oxy, please PTFA!
Steve
Oh good Lord, you almost gave me a heart attack with that title. Godspeed!
Provenance
Based on the thread title, I figured he sold out to Jack.
Grim
You're a dick.
Doctor Love

I don't care if the world ends, I still want my shipment! poster_spam.gif
absinthist
IF anything goes wrong, Son Goku will save the Earth as always.
Nephrite
You might be right.
absinthist
True dat, though comparison is 'tween 1st series of DB and Pokemon in overall (worth noting: Pokemon is not evolving, same xit every episode, and it might cause epilepsy).
sixela
QUOTE(Oxygenee @ Sep 10 2008, 03:51 AM) *

Also, Pontarlier glasses will be back in stock next week from Absinthe Spoon. I appreciate that in the circumstances this may, or may not, be useful information.


As I said, someone in the CERN arranged for real hadron collisions to only happen *after* the Pontarlier absinthiades. He must be French, because were he Swiss he wouldn't have cared -- the Boveresse Fête is already past us.

I think it's this man.

[A metallic voice utters: "Be prepared for unforeseen consequences".]

IPB Image

Now the real scoop: "This machine will probably bring unexpected results[ […]," Hubert Reeves said.

Hubert Reeves is the G-man!
sixela
QUOTE(Oxygenee @ Sep 10 2008, 03:51 AM) *
Within a few minutes, the rest of the solar system would allegedly follow.


"Allegedly" indeed. From a distance, a black hole with the earth's mass and on its orbit would behave very much like the Earth, and as far as I know, it's failed to swallow the entire solar system.
Jaded Prole
Just in case, commence with the drinking!
Donnie Darko
As long as Gordon Freeman is involved we'll be OK.
sixela
QUOTE(Donnie Darko @ Sep 10 2008, 12:37 PM) *

As long as Gordon Freeman is involved we'll be OK.


Apart from an alien invasion eradicating almost all of the human population and enslaving the rest, that is.

And the Combine is definitely for Big Government, so even the Chonger would be pissed off.

No, we can't have that, now, can we.

On the other hand, the Reproductive Suppression field is *the* 100% failsafe answer that guarantees a lack of abortions, so it's not all bad.
Donnie Darko
I love that game. I hope they make another one.

I also hope they make a sequel to Portal. In fact I wish I had a portal gun right now. The Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device is totally cooler than CERN.
sixela
QUOTE(Donnie Darko @ Sep 10 2008, 07:39 PM) *

I love that game. I hope they make another one.

I also hope they make a sequel to Portal. In fact I wish I had a portal gun right now. The Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device is totally cooler than CERN.

Yeah, but rumours abound that in HL2 Episode 3 the Combine is going to show you it's kewl for them to have it, too.
Zenzero
Hey sixer, don't forget about the blind with one eye, while you're somewhat over active and all over the place, posting and replying.
sixela
The one eyed is asleep (after having failed to sleep for two nights, because she needed eye droplets every 30 minutes -- day *and* night).
Zenzero
Get well soon to all of you! Hope everything will be fine and healed way, way before the Absinthiades start.
Nymphadora
QUOTE(Jaded Prole @ Sep 10 2008, 02:57 AM) *

Just in case, commence with the drinking!


And fuck the diet! Where's my chocolate?
Donnie Darko
You can eat dark chocolate by itself while on a diet. The saturated fat in chocolate is mostly stearic and oleic acid, which are either neutral or even healthy, depending on how your body handles cholesterol. As long as you eat but don't binge on high-cocoa content dark chocolate it won't affect your diet goals. The problem with chocolate is that it's usually just one ingredient in something with a shitload of sugar and bad fat (like chocolate ice cream) and so people read these studies about how chocolate can be slightly beneficial and think that means they can eat M&Ms or Ben & Jerrys.
Tibro
Somehow, I don't think that was exactly what she was looking for when she said, "Fuck the diet." Certainly not the tack I would've tried. But the lecture put me off the mood anyway.

I know, more chocolate!
Doctor Love

Why waste calories on chocolate when you can have bernaise sauce instead?

Selmac
I had a Lindt 85% bar last night with a pretty good verte.

Heaven.
Tibro
Just try that with a sauce béarnaise.
OCvertDe
I'm pretty sure my wife has a bag of Lindt 85% upstairs. I'll be right back…
dakini_painter
Better to have the chocolate than that trans-fatty filled instant dinner.
Doctor Love

Nonsense, if the world is ending I'm going out on a trans-fat and hard booze bender!
dakini_painter
Hard chocolate and hard booze go well together, and at 140 proof it's hard to get harder than absinthe. evill.gif
Wild Bill Turkey
Choco-booze
Shabba53
Fuck chocolate. Bring on the bacon.
Doctor Love

Bacon with béarnaise? Now you're talkin'

Tibro
QUOTE(Doctor Love @ Sep 11 2008, 11:43 PM) *

Nonsense, if the world is ending I'm going out on a trans-fat and hard booze bender!

I don't care how you do it, but the sooner the better.
Donnie Darko
QUOTE(Shabba53 @ Sep 11 2008, 09:29 PM) *

Fuck chocolate. Bring on the bacon.


It ain't a meal if it don't squeal.
Shabba53
QUOTE(Doctor Love @ Sep 11 2008, 11:42 PM) *

Bacon with béarnaise? Now you're talkin'

That's be a nicely kicked up version of sausage gravy and biscuits.
Jaded Prole
Make that real dry cured country bacon!
Shabba53
Oh yeah. abs-cheers.gif
Doctor Love
QUOTE(Tibro @ Sep 11 2008, 10:19 PM) *
I don't care how you do it, but the sooner the better.


If I go I'm taking you with me viking_emoticon.gif
Steyr850
Give me some streak 'O lean.
Tibro
QUOTE(Doctor Love @ Sep 12 2008, 04:44 PM) *

If I go I'm taking you with me

I must respectfully decline. I'm on a diet. But, please, go right on ahead without me. In fact, I insist.
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