Not sure where I've been the past five years or so, but it's been quite the ride. How's things?

Probably not as lively as you remember them around here, despite the plethora of absinthes that have been released.

Btw, didn't you used to be Jesus?

I did, but that whole life without sin just isn't my bag. Crucifixion isn't much of a selling point either.

I thought Jesus was the teller at my local bank.

The sign in front of him said he was.

Nobody fucks with the Jesus!